Saturday, January 16, 2010

Looking Back





Checking my hair in the mirror this morning. Was the ever greeting gray hair replacing my once beautiful sandy blond. I couldn't help then to notice the small wrinkles around my eyes and mouth. The things that went through my mind...ahhhh!
Then my mind turned me back to my younger days and the day I got married. Was a scary time for me. Traveling to France to meet a man that may or maybe not be the one for me. I suppose every bride goes through those emotions and looking back on it. I"m so glad I didn't give in to the pre-jitters..lol
Marriage isn't easy and there aren't any hand manuals on how to go about it. I would say that it's significantly harder being married in Algeria as supposed to living in a modern country..Europe, USA, ect My husband and I lived in France the first year of marriage and it was wonderful. Sometimes when things get a little stressed I look back on that time and hold it close. Telling me I know the man my husband can be :)
To think that getting married was a obstacle. Coming to Algeria in 1998, during the last years of terrorism. I'm telling you I had some big ones down there to make that move. I suppose love makes you invincible kinda. Life was nothing like it is now. There wasn't cell phones and English t.v. No internet with unlimited access and many of the comforts I have now. Just me, hubby and my mother-in-law , with a huge 3-story house to keep up and not a clue to go about the cleaning rituals of Algerian women.
Don't even touch the kitchen aspect. An American who is used to buying everything in a box or can. There wasn't places to eat out at that time. You were to afraid of car bombs and the unknown. My husband didn't let me go out in those days. I was home bound for days at a time. It was a hard time for me. 
I admit I almost abandoned ship twice with all the stress. But then god threw me a curve ball when I got pregnant with my first daughter. Then I was so into being a mother I forgot everything else. Then I began becoming more confident in language . Hubby decided it was ok for me to adventure somewhat on my own. later i found out that he had talked to all of them before to make sure I was being well taken care of...sweet :) 
Now I'm the mother of 4, drive a car, and have all the freedom I wish. I no longer kill people with my dishes and can say I hold my own with any Algerian woman here. It takes courage to come live here and everyday you hear of someone taking the steps I took so many years ago. I salute your courage and may the life you choose bring you happiness.

xxoo 

11 comments:

I love coffee said...

Nice to hear that you are having an easier time in Algeria now and have overcome many challenges. =) I am getting married soon so I hope I can be as courageous and strong as you.

Crazy Texan said...

May God Bless your union and I know that you will have much success. I wish you all the best and welcome to my blog. looking forward to getting to know you. xxxx

://: Heni ://: said...

Esalaams;

Yes I would def say you hold your own here. You are a model expat sis ... my hero! I refer to you for so much you just donnot know ... not even mention our friendship!

I can relate to too much of what you wrote about ... Love ya as usually Mrs. Algerian LOL!

Who is the man in the pic? Hubby? Not recogize him ...

Kisses!

Ines said...

you are definately another of my heroes...i really admire you for what you've been through and were you got in your life in dz...i still think you are the best craziest texan chick i know, take care sis

Rainbow In The Grey Sky said...

I have to side with Ines you are my Crazy Texan ex pat amazing woman and may Allah bless you and keep you strong always , ease your hardships ameen. Your post made me cry, the reminder of the civil war.i first visited Algeria in 1995 alone , newly wed and a new mommy when the curfew were in place and car bombs a common scenario............2005 i made hijrah alone with 3 children , Allah had other plans for me and we all returned in 2008. I felt your post right where it was written from the heart!

umm nidal said...

Thanks for sharing that! Gives me a bit of perspective on my life here in the states. I will shut up now!!!

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Staying anon said...

Wow - that was so great to read. Thank you. I've just returned from marrying in Algeria. My husband will be joining me overseas asap though inshAllah. I have a friend who has recently moved to Algiers too - I think she misses home but she's going to be fine I'm sure. Again, thanks for sharing.

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uk4dz said...

Wow - LOVED reading your story there and I agree, you are a role model for so many!!